:: Sunday, December 12, 2004 ::

I fucking hate Christmas. The End.

Oh and I can't believe it's been 10 months since Jeff passed away. Fuck.

:: Styk 3:56 PM [+] ::
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Here I am again with my bi monthly post as if anyone but me gives a shit.

I heard a new song from Jeff that I have never heard before. Something he wrote with Kate. It really pains me to know that this is the last piece of creation from Jeff that I will ever hear. There will be no more. Ever. Never ever. It hurts. I cry. I listen over and over again. The notes and peaks cut like a blade. Lift goes on, it goes on without him, but I think of him. I wonder why. It seems so non descript to deal. It hurts to think that this is it, go on and live, almost as if he never existed. I declare bullshit.

I really miss Dad. I sit and think that maybe in my minds eye, I can see them sitting on a ledge in heaven, watching over, laughing and causing little pieces of havoc, just for fun. I hung a christmas ornament from my Dad, the stupidest things will make you cry.

Why did my peaceful little world get toyed like this?

:: < Tortured > 9:16 AM [+] ::
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