Clarification - When I say the old material is dead for me it does not mean it doesn't mean something to me. There are quite a few songs that I still love and cherish and always will. I guess I mean that in some respects I am not the person I was then. I have grown. I don't feel connected to that time and place anymore. With that feeling of distance I find it hard to put everything I have emotionally into playing the material live. I would never deny what exits. A great deal of this also pertains to Jeff I suppose. It doesn't seem right without him..playing it live I mean. All of the material I wrote alone except for one but he seems connected to it somehow and to perform it live as I have done twice now since his passing just feels rather depressing. In order for me to move on I need to step away from that connection. Some material I believe will stay. It simply was too good and meant too much. Frankly I am I'm just to the point Jeff and I were both at with Visions. Unless it is something new it just isn't fun anymore and to some degree rather depressing.

I suppose it relates to my perspective on performing Visions material live again at some point. It just seems like it should be left alone to stand on it's own for what it is and was. A song or two here and there won't hurt, but to continue on with something just because is not a good reason. In fact I don't agree with it at all. Jeff's passing signaled change whether we all liked it or not. Change is not a denial of the past..it is surviving and moving forward.

Deep thoughts by Styk...:)

Feeling rather introspective today...sorry for the mush...please continue...

So "real life" is finally taking a break and settling down. Things are looking up dare I say. Still not exactly "happy" about what happened to get to this point but the end result is I will be happier.

So I suppose I should address "band" issues. Well I have been approached by two separate entities to do a show. Neither one appeals to me at this point. First off I am writing new material and would prefer not to do a show until I can put mostly new material in the set. Secondly I am not very fond of the venue for one of the shows not to mention other crap and people I have no interest in dealing with. Lastly do I even have a band still? Well there is me. I didn't go anywhere. Jeff? Well that's a no brainer. Sasha? I have no idea. Will? Seems he's moving on to other things though I really don't know the whole story or details. I am happy for him but the communication has been minimal so I'm just hanging until I "know" where everyone stands I guess. The reality is that I do believe coming up shortly I will not have a live band so it seems a show is pointless until I do. I don't feel like doing a show "just because" personal change is in the future for some members, not that that isn't a good reason. I'm tired of doing shows just to do shows. I'm looking for a little more feeling and emotion behind it. There isn't any for me with the old material. It is dead. So until then I will continue to write and work on the new CD. Now that other aspects of my life have gone down in the stress level department I can focus. I have somethings in mind for when I'm ready to "go live" again but at this point I am open to suggestions and input. It seems it is time for StykFaktor to change.

And so it will....